i won $118 on one of them pulltab thingies! i spent it all on people i love for a night out! i had a perfect night! i had a conversation with someone ive known for a year or so that night! he seemed genuinely surprised that i had this whole other volunteering, school-going, hottie-intellectual lifestyle! he thought i was just a hottie? or just dingy? which would be more insulting? why do i not open up to people more? why am i just now figuring all this out? im going to make something beautiful tonight!